Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke by Eric LaRocca
A sapphic digital romance turns depraved very, very quickly.
⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️
Pros: short read, lots of character development in such a short time, unsettling and gross
Cons: really gross
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Animal cruelty, Animal death, Body horror, Suicide, Miscarriage, Racism, Vomit
Well, hello Eric LaRocca, it's so nice to meet you.
This book was one of the first books that I saw repeatedly on my FYP when I first joined booktok back in early February. Along with the visually intriguing cover, I was hearing things like "grotesque" and "super gory" and "you won't even know what you just read" kinda stuff so like... I had to read it, right? I had never read Eric LaRocca's stuff before, I didn't know what to expect other than the brief descriptors from booktok. I also didn’t have a full understanding of what splatterpunk was so… I wasn't ready. Even if I had been briefed more thoroughly, I still don't think I would've been ready. I don't really like body horror but I still read it. It's my attempt to prove something to myself? I have no idea why I am like this.
Y'all know by now, I do not go in depth on shorter books out of fear of giving too much away, however, this book has a lot to unpack AND I feel like a good outline of what to expect may help someone, somewhere, decide whether or not this book is for them. Let's dig into the disgusting, brutal story Things Have Gotten Worse Since We Last Spoke.
The story starts out with our main character Agnes trying to find someone in a chatroom to buy her antique apple peeler. Another woman, Zoe, shows interest and they strike up a conversation. During the conversation, Agnes reveals more about herself, her relationship with her family -to be honest, Agnes is a bit of a wreck but Zoe shows compassion and support. A relationship is born. I will admit, during this entire exchange, I was very confused. Like... what am I reading? What is this shit about an apple peeler? I had no idea what I was in for.
As the two women grow closer, things begin to turn dark fairly quickly. Their entire exchange is online, they never meet or connect in person, though Zoe begins getting Agnes to do things IRL for her, sick things. Zoe tells Agnes that she wants to control her every move, thought, action. Sadomasochism at its finest; the entire time, I was screaming "ASK FOR CLARIFICATION, AGNES, DON'T JUST SAY YES." She clearly didn't hear me though and we were off to the races.
Here is a rapid fire list of the things that happen next.
Spoiler Alert
Zoe requests Agnes get a salamander from the park and keep it in her pocket with her all day. At the end of the day, Zoe tells Agnes to kill it. She complies and smashes it with a rock. I beg your fucking pardon.
Agnes, rightfully traumatized by the whole ordeal, breaks up with Zoe.
They don't speak for a while.
Agnes reaches out to Zoe, apologies, begs for another chance. Zoe agrees and they get back together. I am on edge.
Agnes, in spite of all the weirdness and clearly on her way to a mental breakdown, starts talking about wanting a baby with Zoe. ::breathing heavy::
Zoe wants a baby too but tells Agnes that she can't give her that, but that Agnes can have life inside her ::gulp:: Agnes is to go to a butcher shop -stay with me, we're almost out! - buy a steak, leave it in the sun for days so it can mold/fester and then Agnes has to eat it, resulting in a tapeworm. I am not hungry, thank you
Agnes does everything like she's told, and very excitedly at that. She is BEAMING with pride over their little tapeworm baby and it's at this point I realize just how sick Agnes is. How sick this whole thing is!
Zoe must have realized it around the same time I did because she dips. She tells Agnes that she is sick, needs to seek help and to not contact her anymore.
Agnes does NOT oblige this request, she continues to message and email Zoe, gushing over their "baby" ::eye shift uncomfortably::
GET READY BECAUSE THIS IS GOING TO GO FAST AND IT IS AWFUL AND JUST BREATHE THROUGH YOUR NOSE
Agnes has "given birth" ::sigh:: and writes Zoe for the last time. As the letter trails off, you are left in a haze of "what the fuck?" but personally, I read the ending as Agnes cut out her own eyes with the apple peeler, killing herself.
WOO WHAT A RIDE, THE END, THANK THE LORD
I do recommend this book to people who enjoy gore and emotional distress! Have fun guys :)