My Worst Books of 2023
2023 felt longer than the line into hell and these books did not help. Let's discuss the worst books I read in 2023!
You may recall that I started my YouTube channel because of a shitty book. I read it, it sucked, it wore heavy on my soul and I felt the need to get this book OUT of my body. So now, my rant reviews get the most clicks and since I’m interested in giving the people what they want… here are my worst reads of 2023.
Click below to watch me go over them, scroll on if you just wanna see the list! I even included links in case you don’t believe me and want to read them for yourself!
The Things We Do to Our Friends by Heather Darwent - gorgeous cover but disappointing insides. This wasn’t god awful but it did not work for me. It is a dark academia thriller that hardly ever takes place in “dark academia” and the pacing was so off that by the time things started to happen, I had already checked out. Beautiful cover, interesting premise, disappointing read.
You Are Only Just Beginning by Morgan Harper Nichols - while I am a fan of MHN’s artwork on Instagram, this poetry collection - while beautiful - read very juvenile to me and that was just not what I wanted from this book. Would make a great coffee table book or gift for an upcoming high school/college grad but beyond that, it missed the mark for me.
Promises and Pomegranates by Sav R Miller - (available on KU) this was said to be Hades/Persephone inspired and I gotta tell ya… that’s a lie. There was a pomegranate on the cover. That is about as far as that goes. It is mafia romance and a forced marriage between an unhinged male mafia boss and his boss’s freshly 18 yo daughter. There was no plot. Awful.
Commitment by Mona Simpson - another book that just didn’t hit. This was a domestic contemporary fiction but it was not engaging in the slightest and I glazed over many times while reading it. If you asked me to summarize what happened or even what this book was about… I can’t.
Games and Rituals by Katherine Heiny - a short story collection that fell short (excuse the pun) I was mildly interested in the first couple of stories but after that, again, I just zoned out and never felt the pull to check back in.
Sing, Nightingale by Marie Helene Potras - short but weird and discombobulating in a way that if you held a gun to my head and asked for a recap, RIP to me. Please send flowers to my wake.
Becca's Bargain by Vicky Albert - (available on KU) if you got me drunk - and I mean DRUNK - and asked me to make up a curvy girl/pirate romance on the spot, I think it would be better constructed than this was. Awful and almost embarrassing to read. 15 minutes I won’t get back.
Meet Me at the Lake by Carley Fortune - contemporary romance with insta love and a bunch of nothing as far as feelings or longing, etc. There was just nothing to grab onto and as a result, it slipped away from me. Oh, and there was a part in the audiobook that the narrator read the line “type a-ness” but I heard “tight anus” and I could not let that go.
Haunting Adeline by HD Carlton - (available on KU) shocking to absolutely no one who watches my channel, this was one of the worst things I have ever read, from a craft standpoint, from a common sense standpoint. The characters were so stupid and immensely unlikable, their “relationship” was just abuse and there was an editor… I’m just not sure what they were up to.
The Wild by K Webster - I don’t even want you to seek this book out, this book is my mortal enemy. I re-read this shitstain of a book (incest romance between a father and his teenage daughter) so I could record a new and improved review of it for my channel and as long as I draw breath on this planet, this book will be in every “worst” list I craft.
The Never King by Nikki St. Crowe - (available on KU) a lost boys/peter pan why choose, dark romance that was too vapid to even really articulate, though I tried. I’m so happy I was commissioned to read and review the rest of the series (3 more books) HOORAY!
Never Contented Things by Sarah Porter - portal, fae fantasy featuring minor, foster sibling romance?! Can you believe this was ass??!?!?!!!? I know, me either. It had such promise -____-
Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood - immediately no. I thought women in stem were supposed to be intelligent? This woman felt a man’s morning wood and rationalized it by calling it a pee-rection. “He has to pee so bad, he got hard. That’s how that works, right?” No you fucking donkey, it’s not. Aside from that, the rest of the story was just as cringey and nonsensical.
Pen Pal by JT Geissinger - (available on KU) a majorly mis marketed “dark romance” that is 100% not what the synopsis says it is and as a result, left me frustrated and confused. Also, the smut was not good.
The Pucking Wrong Number by CR Jane - (available on KU) a dark hockey romance that no one needed nor asked for. It was so, so, so, so cringe. The dialogue, the characters, the circumstances, everything was so laughable and stupid. There were occasional sprinkles of hockey. Woo.
The Only Purple House in Town by Ann Anguire - this fantasy romance with found family vibes wasn’t terrible but it wasn’t great either. It was meh, the characters were ok but not lovable and the love interest was lying by omission to the FMC the whole time. Womp, womp.
Carving for Cara by Dana Leann and Melissa McSherry - (available on KU) if this halloween stalker romance is satire (as I suspect that it is) it is a 3 star read. If it isn’t satire. If these authors were dead dog serious with this, 1 star. Absolutely garbage.
Claiming Mrs Clause by RM Virtues - (available on KU) dark, Christmas MMF romance where Mrs. Clause gets stuffed by 2 hot elves. The typos were upsetting but not as much as the smut.
That One Night by Emily Rath - (available on KU) stupid, stupid hockey romance novella with an instant connection and enough cringey dialogue to feed an impoverished nation despite being so short. A true talent.
KU kept me fed this year. It mostly fed me shit, but I was eating nonetheless.
What is the worst book YOU read this year? I am dying to know!